I've had 3 days of eating high raw, and I've developed some animosity toward bananas right now. But I know they love me so I'm trying to enjoy the times I am spending with them despite my angst toward their being so healthy for me. Sometimes a bar of chocolate, or some fried tofu just sounds SO good that it's hard to get my attachment-oriented, addicted mind away from the concept that nothing but chocolate or fried tofu will satisfy it.
There's a small child inside me who has a little temper tantrum at the idea of eating a meal of bananas. Thankfully, there is also a responsible adult who reasons with the child, and explains that the child is cranky and irritable because they are low on calories, and the bananas are the perfect way to make her feel better. The child knows that chocolate and fried tofu are void of the juicy, sweet carbs that her body is craving, but she WANTS them anyway. Waahhh. The child submits and eats the stupid bananas… then she feels so much better—physically and emotionally. She feels lighter than air and ready to run a marathon, or clean the entire house top to bottom. What happened to that cranky devil who couldn't let go of chocolate and fried tofu an hour earlier?
I've been trying to figure out what I could possibly give myself tonight for dinner that might help satisfy that cranky child. The fruit is great during the day, but I feel like I need to give that cranky child something satisfying at night. Without doing so the resentment toward the bananas just grows and grows… James and I wandered to the nearest HEB tonight, and I totally fell in love with their produce department.
I picked up a 15 lb bag of grapefruits for $6.77. That totally amazed me. I also grabbed a few other things that randomly sounded good, and that I might be able to put into a salad. There was an avocado sitting in our cabinet for the past few days, and I've been really wanting to eat it, but I only really enjoy it in guacamole. So I picked up a tiny onion and lime to make some simple guac. When I got home the cranky child was beginning to wake up, so I figured I'd better make something up quick before she got so cranky that I just crawled into bed without eating anything…
James commented about how he wished there was something savory that he could enjoy too. He isn't a big avocado fan, and really dislikes onions. But I offered him some of the guac, and left the onion out of the mix so he could have some too if he wanted. This act of gratitude actually struck me off guard, as usually I'm pretty selfish about the guac I make—like it's something I'll never have again or something… There was absolutely no selfishness noted this time. Perhaps there's some work being done on the attachments I've had in the past toward foods? Who knows? I divided the guac in half and spooned my half onto my salad and mixed it in—added a little sesame seed and sat down with my cat and some chopsticks to enjoy my savory dinner.
It was phenomenal—the perfect balance of everything. I couldn't have asked for a better meal. It totally satisfied the cranky little kid inside me. I felt it fall to sleep afterwards, peaceful and content.
The salad:
Spring Greens
.5 cucumber
1 zucchini
half of the guacamole (whole guac: 1 organic avocado & the juice of .5 a lime)
very small amount of onion (chopped & piled into the size of a quarter)
sesame seeds
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